Why jokes
Kid: Licks money.
Mom: Hey, don’t lick the money. It is dirty.
Kid: Is that why they call people filthy rich?
Why did the doctor check out Earth?
He had a tummy quake.
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.
Why is the iPhone 7 not a smartphone?
It doesn't know jack.
Why do they have fences around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can’t find home.
A girl and a dog were dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she has no arms.
Why is Sean's fashion so poor? He's retarded!
Why wasn’t the moon hungry?
Because it was full!
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
Why did God invent yeast infections? So women would know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too.
Sally has no arms. She fell off the swing. Why? Someone threw a fridge at her. AAHAHAAAHHAHAH!
A teacher asks a boy in her class, "If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?" The boy responds with, "None." The teacher asks why. "They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot." The teacher says, "The answer is 2, but I like the way you think."
Later, the boy asks the teacher, "3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking it." The boy says, "No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think."
Why did the monkey take his banana to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling good.
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.
"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"
Why is Sunday better than Monday?
Because Monday is a weak day.
Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩⚕️?
Because he had a sour stomach.
Why can’t orphans say "I’m in the ghetto?" Because they can’t say "I’m in a home."