Which One

Which One jokes

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Loyalty

  • Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?

    Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.

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  • Stereotype

  • A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?

    The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.

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    Lesbian

  • If two feminazis are carpet munchers, which one in the lesbian relationship cooks?

    They both don't because both of the carpet munchers are too busy eating each other's pussy 😋 🤪 😌 😏 😜 👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🏆 🥇 💭 🤔 😮 😁 😊 😃 😄 👌 😍 🥰 ☺️

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  • Feather

  • A feather and a depressed boy fell at the same time, which one hits the ground first?

    The feather, because the rope stopped the child.

    Emo

  • A leaf and an emo are both falling from a tree.

    Which one hits the ground first?

    The leaf, the emo got caught by a rope.

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    Teacher

  • Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?

    Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.

    Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.

    5 minutes later

    Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?

    Teacher, the one sucking it?

    Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.

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  • Midget

  • I accidentally bumped into a midget yesterday.

    Me: "Are you ok sir?"

    Midget: "Well, I'm not happy."

    Me: "Well, which one are ya?"

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    Priest

  • Man: I must confess, Father.

    Priest: What are you here to confess?

    Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.

    Priest: And what happened to your son?

    Man: He said a man raped him.

    Priest: When and where did this happen?

    Man: A local church. I don't know which one.

    Priest: ...By whom?

    Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.

    Priest: ...Shit

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  • Couple

  • A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going to the airport, which one gets there first? The lesbian, duh, they get there "lickety-split."

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  • Kid

  • A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?

    The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.

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    Ancestry.com

  • I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.

    She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.

    Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!

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    Rhyme

  • I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

    Welcome for the rhyme.

    Soul

  • My Bff: Hey do want any coffee?

    Me: Yeh, of course.

    My Bff: Ok which one?

    Me: You know... the black one.

    Me: Like my soul...

    My Bff: Jeez you ok?