Whats jokes
What's black, white, and red all over?
A bi-racial car wreck.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."
The mother and her daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The mother realized this and took off looking for her. After a while, she found her tugging on a black man. The mother asked, "What are you doing?" and the daughter replied, "I wan't the chocolate!"
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.
What is the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite food?
His shoulder.
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Boy: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: ....ur parents.
What do you call your daughter's boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?
An ambulance.
What's harder than taking a shit?
Trying to take a shit while constipated!
What are the kids addicted to these days? Juulius Caesar (Juuls).
What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?
"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"
What happens when you cross a cow and a redneck?
The redneck fucks the cow.
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What do you call a Lesbian Dinosaur?
A Doyoulickalotapuss.
Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.
Mom: "Okay, any questions?"
Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."
Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."
What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves!
Just kidding, he hasn’t opened it yet.
What do you call a bad pun?
The pun is not punny!