Whats jokes
Two hunters are walking in the forest together. Hunter #2 flops down, unconscious, and Hunter #1 dials 911.
Operator: "911, what's your emergency?"
Hunter no. 1: "The other hunter, hunting with me in the woods, fell asleep."
Operator: "Check if he's/she's (not assuming genders) dead."
*Operator hears a distant gunshot*
Hunter no. 1: "What do I do next?"
What is a cow on two legs?
Yo mama!
What do you call a baby in the crib?
Boys and girls watch Monsters, Inc.
What do you call a pig doing a karate chop?
Everybody loves "appreciation." So that's what I named my dick.
What did Michael Jackson find on his bedsheets?
Billie's Jeans... Hee hee!
What did Michael Jackson find on his bed?
Billie's Jeans.
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
If you're ever bored, adopt an orphan. What is he going to do, be kissed by Vedanta?
I told my mum that a few guys tell me that you're a MILF.
My mom said what that is. I reply, "Mom, I'd Like To Fuck." My mum started out to laugh, then she told me, "Well, now you need a new stepdad."
What did my grandpa say after he kicked the bucket?
Nothing, I unplugged his life support before he said a word.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
What has 2 legs and is red all over?
What do cows call money?
Moola.
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
What's worse than ten babies stapled to a tree?
A baby stapled to ten trees.
What do you do when you made a misteak?
You do some yoga 🧘♀️ and say, "Namaaa steak."
What was the guy with no arms, legs, or a head name?
Matt.
You wanna know what's a concept? An orphan being homeschooled.
What's a homeless person's favorite cookie?
Pooreos.