Weight

Weight jokes

Car

  • If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.

    Mama

  • Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale the scale said: "You gained another pound, nice going fatso, a few more ounces and you can qualify for your own zip code!"

    Yo mama

  • Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

    Mama

  • Yo mama is so fat that when she is about to put her foot on the scale, the scale begs for mercy.

  • 1
  • Mom

  • Your mom is so fat when she skipped a meal, the whole stock market crashed.

    Your mom is so fat she tripped, and I didn’t even laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

    Saw that shit on Roblox.

  • 2
  • Starter

  • Fat bully. That was just the starter, now do you want the main course?

    Me: I don't think I want that because you already ate it.

    Number

  • Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.

    What would you rate this woman?

    A 7.

    Why?

    Because 7 ate 9!