Weight

Weight jokes

You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.

You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.

Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.

Joe Mama so fat, when she told a joke nobody laughed, but the floor was cracking up.

I got barred from Weight Watchers today.

It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.

Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.

Your mama so fat when she steps on the scale, the scale said, "I'm trying to get your weight, not your phone number!"