Weight jokes

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

She got on the scale, said "to be continued."

You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"

You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.

You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.

Yo mama so fat, when she went on the elevator, it went down.

Yo Mamma's so fat that she falls from both sides of the bed.

Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.

Joe Mama so fat, when she told a joke nobody laughed, but the floor was cracking up.

Yo momma is so fat, her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.

Yo momma's so fat, she doesn't know how to play bacon.

Yo momma's so fat, it takes her 1,000,000 hours on the toilet.

Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!

Yo momma so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall!

Yo momma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her.

Yo mama's so fat, her belly button gets home 15 minutes before she does.

Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.

I got barred from Weight Watchers today.

It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.

You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."

Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.

Your mama so fat when she steps on the scale, the scale said, "I'm trying to get your weight, not your phone number!"