Twins jokes

Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.

What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?

Anna 1 Anna 2.

Twin: Hey twin, how's it going?

Twin 2: Weird, twin. Bye.

Twin: Not funny, dude.

A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."

The other sibling said, "You are, too."

Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."

And the sibling says, "We're twins."

The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."

My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.

Ahmed is a bomber for the Twin Towers.

Even the Twin Towers got a better upgrade than your ugly ass.

My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.

What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!

What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!

What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!

Famous last words.

Twin towers: “Is it a bird, is it Superman? AAAAAHHHHHH SHHHHHIIIIIIIIIZZ!”

Why didn't Superman save the Twin Towers?

Because he's a quadriplegic.

What's the Twin Towers' most favorite band? Al Qaedirection.

I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.

Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"

What do the Twin Towers and murder victims have in common?

Both were owned by their own kind.

WOW! I CAN SEE THE TWIN TOWERS FROM HERE.

Why were the Twin Towers mad during 9/11?

They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead got plane.

What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...

They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.

Genders are a lot like the Twin Towers.

There used to be two of them, now it's a sensitive subject.

Are you the Twin Towers?

Because I want to smash you.

America Twin Tower: "Hey, have you seen the Malaysian Twin Tower? I have, but only from 1971 to 2001."

Malaysian Twin Tower: "I STOOD LONGER!"