Trip jokes
A project manager, a mechanical engineer, and a computer scientist are on a road trip through the mountains. As they're going down a pass, the brakes suddenly fail. The car goes off the road and crashes down into the valley. A bit dazed, the three of them get out.
The project manager says, "Well, the best thing to do is to have a meeting and assess the situation."
The mechanical engineer replies, "Nonsense, I have my pocketknife, I'll fix the brakes with that."
Then the computer scientist comes along and says, "Why make it so complicated? Let's push the car back up the road, get in, and see if it happens again."
Why don’t midgets wear tampons?
Because they’ll trip over the string.
Explain Bear, girl, you're tripping.
What did the horse say after it tripped?
Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!
I went to the dump truck today, and my wife said, "Thanks for visiting."
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane. Man next to me said, "You know we're going to New York, right?" I told him I just wanna know what I got into.
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
I tripped over my wife’s bra. It was a booby trap!
Did you hear that Joe contracted Sugondese Ligma on his trip to Suggon, and now he won’t be able to make it to Saw Con?
Did you see the blind guy trip on a can?
He didn't either.
What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
Yo mama's so dumb, she trips over the wireless internet.
One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!
Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.
Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!
Confucius say: "Gay man who take far, far away trip, hates to leave friends behind."
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
The Emo kid wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.