Trip jokes
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
In Boston we say,
"Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, unzipped his fly and said ‘Hey Jill, you wanna?’ Jill said yes, unzipped her dress, and then they had a ‘daughta’" 🤣
Why can’t you tell JFK facts about Dallas?
Last time he was there, he got his mind blown.
Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.
Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.
Why do orphans go to the ancient pyramids for vacation?
In hope to find a mummy.
Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.
Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
The Emo kid wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
Joe mama so fat when she got sturdy, she tripped on her shoelaces, fell on her face, and fell down 2 floors.
Two baked beans traveled around Australia.
They both ended up in Cairns.
Your mom is so fat when she skipped a meal, the whole stock market crashed.
Your mom is so fat she tripped, and I didn’t even laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Saw that shit on Roblox.
Why did the duck cross the road to get some quack?
Where did Suzie go after the bombing?
Everywhere.
A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm.
"This place looks scary," the kid said.
And the man replies, "I know right, I have to walk out of there alone."
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat.
She said nothing, so I took her to Africa.