Worst Jokes Ever

A young boy was talking to his friend about his family:

"My great-grandfather fought against Napoleon, my grandfather fought against the English, my father fought against the Americans, and my uncle against the Argentinians."

The friend replied: "It seems that your family can't get along with anybody!"

I would tell you a good joke, but I can’t, so here is a bad one.

I would tell you a joke about a teacher, but she’d kill you at school.

Wanna hear a paper joke? You know what, probably not because it’s TEAR-able! :/

Wanna hear a joke? It's called me :|

I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"

A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"

I said, "Yes, I know I am."

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Please.

Please who?

Police, can you stop talking so we can get to the end of the joke.

Lol.

Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

Kids won't eat the broccoli.

A man walks into an AA meeting and asks for a roadmap.

What did the horse say when his throat was sore?

I have a hoarse throat!

I asked my mom if I could be Wednesday (from the Addams family). She said no. She said I would look creepy and weird. She said I HAVE TO BE SOMETHING CUTE. The outfit looked ridiculous. Everyone else looked spooky except for me ;-;.

Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?

I tried to hit G by putting D.

Ah, you wanna read a cheeseburger joke for your friends to hear.

Nah, bro, you're just going to get cheese on your burger.

The more they smile, the less they see.

Remember kids, ejaculate, then evacuate.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What kind of bull doesn’t have horns?

A bullfrog!

"Hump a vow, it makes a cow."

I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger and bigger, and then it hit me.