They jokes
Why are Liverpool not disabled friendly?
They never walk alone.
I'm so poor that they let me buy the entire store! For $0...
What do Michael Jackson and math have in common? They are both hard for kids.
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their mummy?
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
I went to Starbucks today and they asked what I wanted, and I replied with "to die, a shot of bleach, and an deppresso expresso."
Today a child asked if I was an angel. I asked why, and he said, "Mommy says that angels have marks on their wrists because they don't want to be in this world."
What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?
"They forgot the stuffing!"
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?
What do a black and a tornado have in common?
They both wreck neighborhoods.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
Roses are red, violets are blue, people think that you’re fat, until they saw your mom.
Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?
They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.
Being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. They get to play Cut the Rope on the job all the time!
I don't usually make 9/11 jokes. They always go down in flames.
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
How does NASA organize a party?
They planet.
Why do orphans love to go to church? Because they have someone to call father.
Why do orphans like families? Because they wish they had one.