Their jokes
Jesus and his friend went fishing. They both cast their lines out, and both of them get a bite, but Jesus's friend misses and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's a bad sentence to say; if you say it 3 times, something bad will happen to you." They cast it out again, and both get a bite, and Jesus's friend misses again and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus replied, "If you say that one more time, something bad will happen." They cast out again, and Jesus's friend's line snaps, and he says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's the last time something bad will happen." The biggest thunderstorm ever seen appeared, and a lightning bolt struck Jesus, and a voice came from the clouds, "Damn, I missed."
What do Evil Knievel and Michael Jackson have in common? Both have skidmarks on their helmets.
Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?
Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5
What does a depressed person and a fashion enthusiast have in common?
They both have something hanging in their closet.
Sonic says: "If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?"
Memes
get this one guys
doctor: you need to eat healthy.
me: no.
doctor: the last patient who didn't change their diet after I suggested it died.
me: oh my goodness.
doctor: in a plane crash.
me: that sounds unrelated.
doctor: I'm the one that crashed it. Do not disobey me!
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
Why does China have the biggest eyewear?
Because all their eyes are too small.
Why do orphans always have water in their cereal? Because the dad never came back with the milk.
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
Q: How do Chinese people name their kids?
A: They throw pots and pans down the stairs and see what noises they make.
Why do emos get discounts at every shop? Because they have barcodes on their wrists.
If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club.
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
Why do orphans eat water with their cereal? Because their father never came home with milk.
What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.
Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?
He took away their ottoman!
If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.
Guys, we need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.