
Eyewear jokes
Why don't phones wear glasses? Because they have contacts!
Why does China have the biggest eyewear?
Because all their eyes are too small.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?
Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!
Why did the rapper go to the optometrist?
Because he needed to improve his RAP VISION.
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
I went to the store and I saw a kid with fake airpods, and I was going to tell him, "Nice fake airpods," but it was his hearing aids.
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks... You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Today, I spotted Johnny Depp on the clearance rack at Kmart. Kmart is currently trying to clear its inventory of wife-beaters.
Never buy an epileptic kid light-up Sketchers.