The jokes

Sex

Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.

I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.

Car

By the time I ran my wife over with my car, I had to stop for gas twice.

Mama

Yo mama so fat, she fell over. Nobody laughed, but the ground cracked up.

Memes

Hair

Bro, you look like you got your hair from the Roblox avatar shop.

Mama

Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.

Pepperoni

Why were the Twin Towers angry?

Because they ordered pepperoni, but they got plane.

Country

My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.

Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.

Car

I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.

A really short guy got out of it and said, โ€œIโ€™m not happy.โ€

I said, โ€œWell, which one are you then?โ€

Uncle

One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.

Jar

Why do they call it Ovaltine?

The jar is round, the mug is round, they should call it Roundtine.

Guy

What did the Chinese guy say to the Italian guy?

ๅŒๆ€งๆ‹็ƒ่œฅ่œด (translate it)

Nut

Which nut has won the World Cup the most times? A Brazil nut.

Part

The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.

Rose

Roses are red, violets are blue, The children are fast, But Elmo is faster, Bow down to your master!

OnlyFans

Roses are red, violets are blue, give me free OnlyFans so I don't touch the youth.