The jokes

Best part about being an orphan?

Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"

The only hood I like is pointy and white.

That's why I can't trust people when I don't see their face at night.

What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?

The bottom one ate its way out!

You are so small that you play hockey against the curb!

Why did the duck cross over the cave? Because he wasn't a chicken.

IDK, sorry...

If you're having a bad day, just remember the Blobfish exists.

When they spilled coffee on his neck, he got hot under the collar.

Yo mama so fat that when Thanos tried to snap her out of the world, he couldn't do it, so instead, he clapped her out of the world.

What did the fat girl say to the donut?

"I'm going to eat you tonight..."

How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?

As soon as the bomb exploded on her.

Why doesn’t the orphan have any toys? Because his Lego figures ran away too.

Did you know there is no "p" in the alphabet? ABCDEFGHIJKLM(NOP)!

I watched the series of "Unfortunate Events" 4 times, all the shows 4 times. I am crying. I am trying to finish the rest, then my brother comes in and says it is PG (Parental Guidance). After that, my brother called me a baby, then he pushed me off my bed. 😭

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Fishes.

Fishes who?

Fishes the police, come out with your hands up!

Why did the number 10 make friends with 0? Because you have $100 dollars.

Why did the clown not attack Mike? Because they bouncee.

I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?

But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.

Two friends wanting to find out if their buddy was gay.

The two walked up to their buddy and said, "Get down!" and he kneeled down.

The waiter asked me, "How would you like your steak?"

I replied, "As soon as possible!"

Two gay men walk into a bar. One of them turned to the other and said, "Hey, what do you say we get out of here?"