The jokes
Why did the math book look so sad?
Because it has many problems.
What did the tomato say to the sad pickle?
"What's the big dill?"
Okay class, who can tell me who the fastest readers are?
The pilots of 9/11 went through the Twin Towers, 6 in 3 seconds.
Why did the orphan commit a crime?
Because they wanted to be wanted!
Why can't the orphan eat Doritos?
They were all family sized!
Friend: What are you doing?
Me: Putting peanut butter on my balls.
Friend hears in the distance, "Orphans, I have food for you!"
After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.
Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?
That one friend: 11 - T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
Why did the doctor turn the orphan down?
Because he is a family doctor.
My wife told me to hang her the salt, so I beat the shit out of her. My name's Kyle, by the way.
Your mama's so fat that she's bigger than the Titanic.
Who is the first person an orphan sees? The doctor.
Poop and balls through the walls!
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
I went to the store and I saw no oranges, and I went to ask the cashier:
"Cashier: Which one?"
Yo mama so OLD...
Her first Christmas... WAS the FIRST CHRISTMAS!
Can you imagine The Count from Sesame Street having sex? "1 orgasm..., 2 orgasm..., 3 orgasm..., ah ah ah!"
Why did the qack go duck?
I don't know, rhydon deez. 4x2=8
F*ck in' the poo.
Best friend makes joke about 9/11.
Me: My pop was a part of that!
Best friend: So sorry!
Me: My pop was the pilot of the plane, he flew through 89 floors.