The jokes
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
Why was the chicken black and the other were white? Adoption!
Once I heard a joke about chocolate the other day.
It wasn't that funny.
So I just Snickered.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the “utter” side.
When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"
Memes
Kid: Dad, what happened to the kidnapper?
Dad: He had a nap.
Kid: Where is he now?
Dad: HELL!
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?
The first time I EVER HAD SEX I WAS ALL ALONE. You know why?
IT WAS DARK and I WAS ALL ALONE!
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball?
He had no-body to go with.
I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy?
A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!
Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."
Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.
Why was the orphan able to avoid getting into trouble at school?
Because they couldn’t call his parents!
How do u get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope they hung themself in...
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To die on the other side.