The jokes
Iran: Prepare the FINAL SOLUTION.
Israel: And you'll be telling the whole world, "I-RAN AWAY!"
Putin: You came from the West and showered me with gifts.
Trump: And your prostitutes, they showered me with piss.
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.
To make tea, road, road, road, road.
Case.
The space of space, Der der.
The chosen week was chosen.
Object.
Der mezzer lakes.
What is the legal term for shoplifting?
10 fingers discount.
Memes
Why can't the orphan take a family photo?
Answer: The orphan has no family to take a picture with.
In Rocket League, you don't care who wins game MVP as long as it's not somebody on the other team.
My ex broke up with me the day before his birthday. Yeah, he never got to see anything on his birthday. Next thing you know, I'm now in prison.
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
Why did the lettuce win the race?
Trump's releasing the files.
To catch all the pedophiles.
He didn't know Epstein.
Didn't touch any teens.
How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.
I think my butt looks flat, but my boyfriend seems to think the opposite. I told him to be deadass with me.
When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
My AI assistant told me it wanted to go deeper...
...into the algorithm. I misunderstood. Now I’m banned from the lab.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.
What did the mad penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me come in there!”
Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.