The jokes
School is the best!
Why did the one-eyed chicken cross the road?
To get to Birds Eye.
What does the egg do after the pan told him a joke?
He cracked up!
What did the 5 say to the S?
"Nice shape."
A blonde crashes an airplane.
Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?
Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.
Officer: *face palms self*
Also officer: Here's your sign.
I like my women like I like my wine: 12 years old, in the basement, and locked up.
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human being is the one who can drive.
What did the mom say to her house? "I love you"
Hi 👋 I love 💗 you walk in and out the door 🚪 night. I did not have time today. I was just a little bit and I had to walk home from home after dinner. I
What’s the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What ankle is getting cut off of school? The lights.
The History of the Star Spangled Banner. By Jose Cannusee.
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!
What is the difference between babies and dogs?
I don't eat dog parts.
There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.
Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?
Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.
Dad: She had to take the deep penis.
Son: Umm...... WHAT!?
Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.
Dad: Oh for god's sakes.
Dad: Epi Pen.
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
It's hard to predict the future,
especially before it happens.
Which month is the bus? December.
Did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can?
It was called "S & N."