The jokes
Why couldn't the GREAT WHITE beat the HAMMERHEAD?
because the GREAT WHITE kept getting BONKED on the HEAD by the HAMMERHEAD!
What's the difference between a school bus and a cactus?
On a school bus, the pricks are on the inside.
Driving through the woods today, I saw a boy with a bare behind.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid sitting on his lap?
"Just beat it."
Memes
When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.
My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.
Why do they call it abortion? Because they aborted the mission.
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
The Blonde got a Ph.D.?
Yeah, like that would ever happen.
For all the online haters on me, comment here, be honest.
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.
Well on the positive side: the Mexicans will probably want to pay for, and build, that wall at this point! Maybe the Canadians as well; two free walls!
I would have loved to ride the Titanic at least once ;)
iykyk
What's the definition of a bastard?
Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!
So, an orphan walked into a store. He gets lost and the store clerk asked, "Do you need help finding your parent?" and the orphan ran out crying.
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.
So I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
Why did the music teacher need a ladder to reach the really high notes?