The jokes
How do you get a hippy pregnant?
Cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.
Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? Their dad can’t wake them up.
Why do orphans play tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
Memes
Moto Moto, stop giving the baby your d*ck!
Why are Asian's dicks too small?
So they can reset the calculator.
You are shore to find loads of jokes funny even if I can’t kelp you find the right ones.
Loads of jokes are funny as I’m shore you shall sea.
Yo forehead so big it receives more than the Pacific Ocean!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Only the apple got picked up.
Me. I am the joke.
Someone went to fly and thought of pizza.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
I went into the supermarket; everything was half off. Of course, I took the bottom half of Spider-Man.
So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”
What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel?
"Stop staring at my nuts."
Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"
Why is it always cold in the hospital?
To keep the vegetables fresh.