The jokes
What is the difference between a hipster and a hockey player?
A hockey player showers.
I wanted to tell a joke about Jonestown.
But the punch line is too long.
Do you know what the F in orphan is for...
Family.
A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."
The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"
The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."
What is a terrorist's DJ name?
Osama Spin Laden Dropping beats like the Twin Towers!
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, but at the end, you lose your house.
My last best man's speech was like the marriage--short, occasionally funny, and ultimately ruined by the bridesmaid.
What's the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?
Not too sure. I just fly the drone.
Osama Bin Laden was trying to give me relationship advice.
Probably wasn't the best time to say "OK Boomer."
COVID is like fashion...
We started hearing about it in Italy...
Became popular in LA and NYC...
Florida ignored it...
And it was all made in China in the end.
What's the difference between three cocks and a joke?
Your mom can't take a joke.
I walked up to some Arabs and said "Alawakba," then here came the second tower.
Why was the rapper cold in the recording studio?
Because his bars were ice.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
What is the difference between genders and the Twin Towers?
They used to be two, now it's a touchy subject.
What did the llama say when the villagers said that he had to leave the village?
"Alpaca my bags."
What do you call a fat Indian sat on the floor?
A meatball/malteser.
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?
Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
Your forehead is so big, the earth split in half!