Swiss jokes

If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"

Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...

We saved a Swiss flag from a house fire. I thought that's a plus.

A German, a Swiss, and a Russian make a bet: whoever has the most forest area in their country wins about 10,000 euros.

First, they fly over Switzerland: 8,000 square kilometers of forest. The German starts getting cold feet, as he doesn't think he'll win. Next, they fly over Russia: 50,000 square kilometers of forest. The German realizes he doesn't stand a chance unless he cheats.

When they fly over Germany, they see 10,000 square kilometers of forest. The German seems to have won, but then the Swiss shouts: "That's a tree!" The German was accused of fraud.

The German is furious. He calls the head of the Bundeswehr: "Why did the tree move?!" The boss said, "I'll put the guy who moved on the line," and passed the receiver over.

"Why did you move?" the German asked.

The young man replied: "Okay, when a dog came along and peed on my trunk, that was still fine. But then a bear came along and rubbed against my trunk..."

What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? -- Well, the flag is a big plus.

Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?

Who else would think of adding gas?

A German went to France for a holiday, and here is the scene. French border staff asked, "Occupation?" The German replied, "No, no, no, just visiting."

What's the best thing about Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.