Suicide

Suicide jokes

Friend

  • What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.

    Kid

  • A leaf and a depressed kid fall from a building. Which hits the ground first?

    The leaf, the rope stops the depressed kid.

  • 1
  • Kid

  • Kid walks in the door. "Mommy and Daddy, I'm home." Mommy and Daddy meanwhile in their room moaning. Kid runs to them thinking they're hurt and sees something he definitely shouldn't have.

    10 minutes later, [he] kills himself.

    Emo

  • I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"

  • 1