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Orphan

Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"

The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"

Kid

The kid in the wheelchair was getting bullied, so I encouraged him to stand up for himself. I don't know why he started crying.

Obesity

Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).

Theme Song

Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

Kid

Quiet kid reaches down and class starts running.

Quiet kid: What's wrong? Pulling out my...

Face

God loved you so much that He gave you one face and started clearing off a place for another.

Cucumber

What is long, hard and has cum in it? Cucumber.

What is a 3 letter word that starts with S ends with X and has a vowel? Six.

Meme

I watched a documentary called "Redline Carrera: Birth of the Memes." It all started with Paul Walker.

Kidney

When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.

When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!

9/11

What makes 9/11 an inside job?

Someone started calling it 10/7.

Car

I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.

Tic Tac

I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.

It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled ā€œIbuprofenā€ though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!

Tower

I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.

They always start with two towers downed.

Police

I recently got pulled over by the cops and started spazzing out because of the police lights.

He arrested me for impersonating George Floyd.

*I have seizures*

Yo Momma

Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!

Bow

How can you tell a bow n' arrows scared?

He starts to quiver! ;)

Girl

A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.

Miscarriage

I congratulated my friend on losing all that baby weight. She started crying and told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......

Firework

How do you start a dance party?

Go into the PTSD ward of an insane asylum and set off fireworks and watch the magic unfold.

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