Spy

Spy Jokes

President

A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.

And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"

Lover

What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?

Lesbionage.

Ass

Why do asses make terrible spies?

Because they always CRACK under pressure.

Inflation

President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon.

Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.

Martini

James Bond: Vodka martini.

Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.

James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?

Mama

Yo mama is so fat, when she was a spy, she was called "double obese."

Game

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

Similarity

What similarities do peeping Toms and spies share?

They both see things they shouldn't.

Momma

Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.