Sports jokes

Orphan

  • Why are orphans bad at basketball?

    They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.

    Fan

  • How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?

    All 3 of them.

    Hockey for life!

  • 1
  • Orphan

  • The orphan was playing baseball. He hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.

  • 4
  • Ted Danson

  • What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!

    What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!

    What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!

    I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

    What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!

    What does a baby computer call his father? Data!

    What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!

    Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!

    Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!

    How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

    I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”

  • 2