We were versing year 8 at footy, and they were mostly black, so I told my white friend to WATCH OUT!!!
My wife is pregnant with a 3-year-old, so I gave her medicine, but now she’s pregnant with a 5-year-old.
"Yo mama so fat, she thought Saturn was deez nuts."
Your hairline is so far back even The Rock Johnson couldn't find it.
We were talking about ancient ruins last week, so I said they can ruin your day!
Yo mama so fat, she's the reason why Slenderman has no eyes.
What is so annoying? A younger sister.
Yo mama so fat when she asked for a bathtub, they put a blanket over an ocean!
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
Waiter says, "Sir, we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it!"
Your mama is so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
What do you call a rocky formation covered in meat?
Meatcanyon.
(Meatcanyon is actually a YT that has like 1M subs so watch some of his content if you want to, lol!)
Times have been so tough lately, I have had to jerk off the dog just to feed the cat.
You're so short you could be drowned by heavy rains.
Coworker, why is Sara so blue?
Is it because Sara wishes she had a man? coworker she always watches you with your husband together out of love. You better watch out dear, she might "saraorize" him, with her crooked teeth and ultra-thin lips.
"Prince???? Where are you??? I might have to go to bed for real, but I just wish we could talk at night. Why don't we anyway? (I love you so much!)"
Boy: Your dick is so small, oh wait, you don't have one.
Older boy: UNO reverse card!
"Tj and Prince, I really think we should stop doing this date night, date fight thing on this website because it's driving everyone crazy, and this is a joke website, not a dating website, so I say let's just take this to Facebook."
So, a guy and his brother were walking in the woods, and his brother said, "It's getting dark out here, can we go home?"
The man said, "I know, think how I will feel walking home tonight!"
Yo Mamma's so ugly, she made One Direction turn into the other direction!
