SOS jokes

Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.

(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)

I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.

Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!

Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!

Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.

Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.

I went to school on a Saturday. My teacher asked why I am here, so I replied that my brother told me to go to hell.

You're so poor, if I ever broke into your house, I'd give you things.

Your mum so fat, she broke the stairs down to the fridge.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.

Yo mama so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk.

Yo mama so ugly that when Hello Kitty saw her, she said, "Goodbye!"

Yo mama so hairy that the zookeepers called a code red thinking an ape got loose.

Your forehead is so big, the earth split in half!

You're so fat, you have your own gravitational pull.

I noticed my friend's hairline yesterday. I could tell it was a Supercuts hair salon haircut, so how I could tell was 'cuz it was super alright, super lame.

Your hairline recedes so far back that it defends your forehead.

"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"

Your hairline is so bad, not even God could save it.

Your mom is so fat that the photographer had to go to the moon just to click the photo of her belly button.