Q: Why are orphans so successful? A: Because when they were younger, they got told, "Go big or go home," and only had one option.
SOS Jokes
Yo mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back? Sadly, the hardest part to eat of the vegetable is the wheelchair.
Yo mamma's so fat no one was laughing, but the ground was cracking up.
You're so fat that you cause your heart to have panic attacks.
Yo hairline so long, it makes you look like Mr. Clean.
Yo mama so old, when she left the antique shop, the alarm went off.
Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.
Why do orphans do so well in life?
When people told them "Go big or go home," they only had one option.
Your hairline recedes so far back that it defends your forehead.
Your hairline is so bad, not even God could save it.
Why are graveyards so popular? Because people are always dying to get into them.
Why do they put barcodes on the ships in Norway?
Why?
So when they come into port, they can Scan-de-navian.
Yo momma's so hairy that when the baby came out, it got rug burn.
Who are voting for this election? I'm voting for Tricity, so vote for Tricity. Electricity!
"Don't sneeze!"
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.
Also,
"It dangles and swung!"
Language art quizzes are the best.
I have so many cash machine jokes.
But none of them seem to work ATM.
Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.
Yo' mama is so stupid, she couldn't find a needle in a haystack.
So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.
