SOS jokes

Yo mama is so small that when she saw the Titanic, she called it the size of the Netherlands.

Yo mama so rich,

her blood type is 24 karat GOLD!

My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.

So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"

I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"

My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.

Yo mama is so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

Yo mama so fat that her belt size is the Equator.

Yo mama so fat that when she went into a crowd wearing a blue shirt, everyone yelled, "Tsunami!"

A brother and sister were hanging out, and the brother was sad, so the sister asked why. The brother replies with, "I think I need to break up with you!"

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

Yo mama so ugly, she looks like a green bean with googly eyes.

Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?

Doctor: Yep.

Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.

Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.

Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!

Your hairline is so curvy now, Ice Spice has competition!

Your mom is so ugly when she tried to enter the ugly contest, they said they don't allow professionals.

Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.

Yo, barber fucked up so bad he had to get a breathalyzer test.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can’t find home.

Why are you so white?

Because you have no lotion on.

Your hairline is so far back that your forehead looks like a growing parasite!

Yo mama so fat, when she sits down she dislocates Earth out of its orbit.

I'm 50% human, so that 50% stupid is 100% you.