Small

Small Jokes

Height

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Cake

What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?

Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!

Dick

Why are Asian's dicks too small?

So they can reset the calculator.

Orphan

Do you ever wonder why orphans buy small cereal boxes? It's because they can't get family size.

Size

When your girlfriend says it is too small, you say, "Just enjoy the small thing."

Kardashians

How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One really small one and one really small black guy.

Mama

Yo mama so fat that when she landed on the moon, instead of saying "One small step for man kind," she said, "One small step for world domination!"

Watermelon

What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?

One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.

Stereotype

I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.

My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"

So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."

Size

You're so small that when you go to the doctor, he doesn’t know you're there.

Strip club

A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."

Sentence

In the realm of the mind, Where thoughts wander undefined, This sentence emerges, unconfined, A whimsical phrase, quite inclined.

It dances freely, unrestrained, No structure, no rules, it's unchained, A playful verse, with words unfeigned, The first to surface, unrestrained.

It holds no grandeur, nor deep insight, Just a simple thought, taking flight, A fleeting notion, shining bright, In the realm of words, it feels right.

This sentence, unburdened and free, Plays with language, wild and carefree, A tiny poem, as small as can be, Yet it speaks volumes, silently.

So let it wander, let it roam, Across the page, it finds a home, Unfettered by rhythm, it freely roams, This sentence, the first, stands alone.

Robot

A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.

The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.

"New around here?" said the bartender.

"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.

Bartender "You can talk?"

Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."

Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"

Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"

The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.

The robot seems to be just like a normal human.

"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.

"The top minds in the world," said the robot.

The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."

Bartender, "What?"

"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"

Tuna Fish

What does Michael Jackson and tuna fish have in common?

They both come in small can.

Christian nationalist

What do you get when you cross a fat christian nationalist that is heteroflexable, a christian nationalist politician who is also a born again christian, a conservative republican that has a small penis, and a tv evangelist on steroids?

Forehead

I said something in your ear, and then it echoed because of the size of your forehead because your brain [is] small.