Me: Hey Joe, updog.
Joe: What?
Me: Updog.
Joe: What's updog?
*Facepalms*
Me: Lol in the corner.
Any 8 year old: Sus!
Me: Jake, we're at a funeral!
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
What do you call a downy who can't get a girlfriend?
Down bad.
Why can’t balls move? Because no one is there to voice them around.
I want some cheeseburgers just to eat. I'm talkin' ketchup. My n***a mustard on that BEAT!
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
What does lmao mean? Laughing miles.
Have you ever seen the Pokemon called Ryh... Rhydon these nuts?
One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.
What do you call an abo with a shotgun? Sir.
This man came up to me and asked if I could sell my house to him, and I said sure. Then five days later, he said that the loan should come in the mailbox. Then I checked the mailbox, and the only thing I saw was nothing, so I told the guy, "DEEZ NUTS IN YOUR MOUTH!"
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
Why do girls only stay in odd groups of friends?
Because they literally can't even.
Q: What do you call 9/11? A: Enemy persion airstrike.
The Ace of Spades was Hippy Flipping.
"Fuck" and "sex" are hot, which is fire.
Do you like Wendy's when these nuts hit your face?
Yo mama so "PHAT," she has big boobs and nice legs!
My balls are so purple that I use them as crayons, and I am not talking about the balls you play with. I am talking about the boy balls.
