Sisters jokes

What’s worse than finger banging your sister?

Finding your dad’s wedding ring.

My sister is so annoying. She won $10,000 to go to hell.

White comedy week:

Monster Truck Monday

Trailer Park Tuesday

White Trash Wednesday

Take Your Sister Out Thursday

Fox News Friday

Storm the Capitol Saturday

Say You’re Sorry Sunday

My sister keeps cursing... so I made fun of her... "fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk", fowl language is for chickens!

I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad's half sister.

I called my boss the other Monday and told him I needed the day off because I was sick. He said, "How sick?"

I said, "Well, I'm in bed with my 12-year-old sister."

Hi! This is a good prank I did! Okay, my sister has this crush and his name is Braylon. So, he texted my sister saying he wants to hang out with her, which I think means date. So anyway, I did this. My text said, "Hi Braylon, I can't hang out today... or the other day because I have homework, so please no hang out!" This is super wrong, but funny! Braylon texted back and said, "Fine, I can help." And I texted back and said, "Oh, will come here around 10:00." And my sister did not know he was coming... She was so embarrassed, she was still in her nightgown! HAHAHAH. O to the k, bye, that's the prankster!!!!

My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.

Sister: (moaning) Go get Mom, she'd love this!

Me: But Billy's with her right now.

Billy: UGHHHH...MMMMM

Dad: Hurry up Billy, I want to see you for a moment.

My sister thinks she's so smart. She said only an onion can make you cry, so I brought the belt out, and she started crying.

Q. There were two sisters. One was having twins and asked her sister to help name the children. If one was named Deniece, what was the other named?

A. Denephew.

My sister reminds me of 911: one moan of "OMG" got everyone's attention.

Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sister, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughters. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.

Once my sister was a sister, now she's a blister.

My parents raised me as an only child, which really pissed off my sister.

My sister says, "Dad," and repeats it, and this is my dad: WOULD U STOP me? 😑

Your sister is so ugly, she made Hello Kitty say goodbye.

Me: What’s that girl’s name from Phineas and Ferb, the sister?

Crush: Candice.

Me: Candice dick fit in your mouth?

Crush: *slaps me, walks away*

My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...

So I threw a carrot at her.

To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him.

“Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.”

“Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls,” replies the nun. “I didn't want to get drafted either.”