Sisters jokes

Sister: I don't want to do it, but...

Me: No more butts! Butts are too yuck to be in this sentence.

Why did the brother cross the road? Because the sister farted.

If anyone's gonna be fuckin' my sister, it's gonna be ME!

My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...

So I threw a carrot at her.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1. A castle weighs a ton. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The Queen of England's won! I never thought she'd get it done, but her sister is a nun.

Bf: Do you love me?

Gf: Most of the time.

Bf: Well, it's either yes or no.

Gf:...

Bf: Well, when is it that you don't love me?

Gf: 2:30 to 4:00. Every time when you go to the river an hour, then it takes me a half hour to love you again.

Bf: Why?

Gf: 'Cause you always see that OTHER GIRL.

Bf: MY LOVE! That other girl is my sister!!!

Gf: Ohh...

My mom got a clown for my birthday, but it ended up being my sister. 🤡

So, I was fucking this bitch, right, and I thought I had AIDS.

So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get AIDS. Now what I'm wondering is where the hell does an eight-year-old get AIDS?! I guess my sister needs new friends...

What do tampons and your sister have in common?

Your sister: You're so ugly.

Me: But we look the same, so who's also ugly?

What’s worse than finger banging your sister?

Finding your dad’s wedding ring.

My parents raised me as an only child, which really annoyed my younger sister.

Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?

A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.

Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.

My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.

Why do sisters hate you?

Because you're their favorite stepbrother :P

My sister is so annoying. She won $10,000 to go to hell.

Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?

Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.

Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.

My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.

A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”

St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.

St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.

Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”