Shes jokes

Yo mama is so fat, she had to snap his finger twice.

Yo mama eats so much that she spends her whole life on the toilet.

A man walks into a bar and see's a naked lady, "WOOW SHES HOT!" HE picks her up and pee's on her and says, "Hi lady lets have sex."

Yo mama is so stupid, when she saw on her computer it said "You have 3 cookies," she broke it.

So I told my sister, "Want [to] hear some jokes?" and she was like, "Hit me with [your] best shot, fire away," and I was like, "Okay, I know [you're] singing an old song, yeah I was trying to see if [you] sing too," and I said, "Who do [you] think I am, Chris Brown?"

Yo mama is so fat, she got locked in a weapon store, and she broke it down without any weapons.

Q: Where did Helen Keller go to school? A: Anywhere she was home schooled.

Yo mama so fat, when you married your sister, she was big enough to sit on the groom's side and the bride's side.

When you're excited to finally see your sister, and then you realize she's wearing your clothes.

What do you call your mom when she goes into the shower?

A shower ma! (shawarma)

Yo mama so fricking ugly, she made humans to extinct.

Yo mama so fat, she walked by the TV, I missed 3 episodes!

How did Sally die?

She got shot.

How? She could not run away.

The waiter recommended the rug meal.

She said it was delicious, but it's a tassle to make.

Yo mama so stupid, when I told her she needed some cats, she came back with...

CRASH, ARENA, TURBO STARS!

Yo mama so fat, she sat next to everyone on the plane.

If a prostitute is celebrating her birthday, does she get a hoecake?

A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?"

The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again."

An old woman walked into a dentist's office, took off all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said, "I think you have the wrong room."

"You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them."

A penguin takes his car to the shop, and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn't the cleanest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one look at him and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."

"No," the penguin insists, "it's just ice cream."

If your Uncle Jack was on his roof, and he wanted you to help him down, would you help your Uncle Jack off?

A family's driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect."

"Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"

I saw my girlfriend walking by. I told her, "Wow, you look so beautiful!" and then we started to talk. Then someone came behind me. She said, "What are you doing?" I said, "I'm flirting," and I remember I was talking to my mom, and my girlfriend was HER MOM, which is my sister, but my girlfriend/sister IS MY WIFE, but my mom is my wife too. Looks like I'm getting a divorced but which one, my girlfriend [or] my mom?

I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.

She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm