What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
what did the atom say to the positive in math class. We could make a positive number
It's funny how Stephen hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking but he can't do any of those things
Why does the nucleus feel trapped? Because it’s inside a cell!
I told a chemistry joke there was no reaction
What is a physicist's favorite food?
Fission chips.
What did the neutrino say to the planet? -- "Just passing through."
An atom loses an electron... It says, "Man, I really gotta keep an ion them."
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, "Where'd you get that?"
The student on the bike replies, "While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, "You can have anything you want.""
The first student responds, "Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.