School Shooter jokes
The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"
The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"
The school shooter: "I don't know."
The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”
When a school shooter walks to the intercom and plays Pumped Up Kicks.
What does a light bulb and a school shooter have in common?
They both light up the room.
When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.
When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.
When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.
When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
When the school shooter misses you, but you gotta play it off.
😐😑
When the school shooter walks by the emo kid and doesn’t feel his gun anymore.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
What is a school shooter's favorite animal?
A Desert Eagle.
When the school shooter is about to leave the room, then the autistic kid says, "Goodbye!"
A student was peeking in on a 10/10 chick, and the guy was about to nut.
The school shooter patted his back and told him to leave his corpses alone.
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
Like a shooter says, "I put the fun in funeral!"
When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.