Room

Room Jokes

This 15 year old girl wanted a cross on her room with a long nail on the end over her bed unfortunately it killed her dad because it fell off the wall

(Do you get the joke)

(Her dad was on her and it fell and killed him)

So i was laying in bed and jt winter do my room is aleays cold cause the heater doesnt work. And i was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then i layghed cause who would wanna be with me. Hahaha

so i walked into the kitchen and saw my mom had made cookies i stole one not noticing my mom was behind me.....so my mom said PUT THE COOKIE BACK KID!!!!and i said i wasn ́t gonna eat it and she said then she said nevermind i ́ll get you ́re father so my mom said HONEY DEAL WITH YOURE SON I ́M GOING TO THE MALL!! and my dad said son if ur not allowed to have a cookie before dinner!!so he went into his room and i heard the belt and i was going to run but i knew it would be worse so he said this will be you ́re punishment as he was getting ready to hit me i said daddy no please i wasnt gonna was not going to eat it but he said NO U WONT CHANGE MY MIND LITTLE BOY then he hit me THANK YOU FOR READING STAY HEALTHY AND STAY SAFE IN THIS TIME BYE!!! read more of my jokes they ́ll prob be around the website!!

My Mother: Wanna hear the song Chloe your the one I want on pandora? Meh: No I am tired of that song and I am annoyed by it. Mom: don't talk back to meh like that young lady. Me/ someone else? - -gets silent in da room- Brother: yea this song is very annoying but maybe better than the Chelsea song. Joke is here now what do you do if you hear the name Chloe?

So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup

And I asked him what he is doing

Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if i bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits

Me: Erm................Are you a simp?

Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house

KG: You have it?

Guy: Yup, now can I play with them

KG: Sure!

KG then went to her room.

Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. Your gonna call me over and you will be-

KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it

KG: Have fun playing with them!

Guy: WHAT THE FU-

a texan and a alaskan walk in a room the alaskan says "my state is bigger than yours" the texan says "it won't be when it melts"

a girl looked in the fridge she got mad that somebody at the last ice cream cone she ran into her sisters room and said this is why your fat the fell down the stairs good thing she had that belly roll to save her.

So three daughters were sitting in the same room as their mother, the first daughter asked why she was named Daisy. So the mother replies “Because when we were taking you out of the hospital, a daisy landed on your forehead.” The second daughter asked why she was named Rose. So the mother explained “Same as Daisy, when you we were taking you out of the hospital, a rose petal landed on your forehead.” The third daughter then said “ksvrjxbdkavdowbxksb” so the mother said “Shut Up Brick!”

one time i broke up with my roblox girlfriend by sending her a message, 30 seconds later i heard my uncle crying in the next room

I was at a friends place yesterday, and... There was A mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.

That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.

An hour later they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep. So I looked in the brothers room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.

I sighed at this. "Incest aside. You guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you." I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.

911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up

Mom:You can't die in the living room david so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself David:I will surpase kakarot Jordan:*dead on the living room floor

I guy once went hunting at a Hunting Ranch .After a long day of hunting, the hunter enjoys a couple of cold ones in Rancher’s Living-room .There they were having a grand ole time then the Ranchers wife walks in .The Hunter says “that’s a nice piece of ass you got your self there”,The Rancher replied “(harsh raspy Southern chuckle from years of Marlboro Reds)You’ve never been so right in your life ,honey why don’t show our guest your tits”,.She agrees and shows the hunter her plump DD cup breast.The Hunter says “Nice”,then Rancher said show em yer peker now.She agreed and whipped out a 13 in Johny .Dazed and confused the Hunter says “What in Sam Hill is that!!”,and the Rancher replied “Now....Lemme tell you..There ain’t a thing like it”.

Jay and Andrew, are best friends whom are almost alike, the difference between them both is Jay is poor and well...Andrew on the other hand is suck-a-dick-poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes-up in his room, walks to the kitchen and asks his mom Lisa (I call her Lisa now btw) if there is anything to eat, "No bitch !" She replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed. Now Andrew...wakes-up jumps out of bed and he's in the kitchen, he sees his mom fixing some for work, after a long hard night of giving her husband blue-balls, "Anything left for me Mother?" Andrew asks "Sorry Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work taking her time * Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself "Man...I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if u do my first customer for me!!! "

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My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick I said what up your pussy she said your dick