one day a priest loses his cock (chicken) he goes to the church and says "who has seen a cock" all the woman raised their hands "no who has seen a cock that is not theirs" half the woman's hands went up "NO NO NO who has seen my cock" all the nuns hands went up
what is humble holy and helps? an angle...
A Christian, a Jew, and a Catholic walk into a bar. The Christian says “Where’s Mohammed?
Knock knock... Who's there? It's Jesus, let me in... Why? I have to save you.. From what? From what I'm gonna do to you if you don't let me in.
My mom said i need Jesus in my life, So I drunk up the holy water ;}.
A plane is going to crash there are four passengers and only three parachutes. all the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first he says, my fans need me and jumps, Donald trump takes another and says I am the smartest president, jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute. The boy replies don't worry - Donald took my backpack.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
Q: Why doesn't Jesus play hockey? A: He hates getting nailed to the boards.
If a priest listen to sad music in his church he really enjoys to be deep in minor
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion
I wanted to bomb a restaurant so i went in there with a bomb...but the bomb got diffused and did not work . I asked a person standing nearby i said. "" hey do you know how to fix this bomb so i can blow up this place? "" He gave me a book. It was the quran I said what the hell is that..! He said, " this is the official manual for bomb making."
My friend asked me once, "Is there any religion in the world that preaches a god who masturbates in a closed room." "Islam it is."
A man runs into a church and shouts are there any dawarf nuns in the monsistary,the pope said no causing the man to say to his friend I told you you fucked a penguin
a man died and went to heaven. here he met jesus. there were two clocks, the man asked whats with the clocks?. jesus answered this is mother theresa's clock she has not lied so the clock hasnt moved, this is abraham lincoln's clock; he's only lied twice so its moved twice. where's donald trumps the man asked. jesus replied: its in my office im using it as a ceiling fan.
the terrorists lost there landing gear and had to make a crash landing into the closet building becuse religon
Why don't churches have WiFi? They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works
If you argued that god was a woman 49.8% of the US population would try and raise Hell Just to ask the other guy. Talk about a male supremacist religion.
A priest, a rabbi and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”
Do you know how many women have been pope?
Nun
Bible Verse of The Day-For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. —Romans 8:15-16
