My friend's emo. I told her to play jump rope with me. She hanged herself. Lol.
Imagine you're playing GTA and you finally found out how to take out a gun: Option 1: shoot someone Option 2: suicide
Me: Aren't they the same thing?
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.
The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.
The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.
The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"
The bartender agrees without hesitation.
The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.
"WTF!" the man shouts.
The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"
Lmao, idiots don't know how to play Jenga.
I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.
In his old life, Michael Jackson mustβve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......
why do orphans suck at baseball because they never could play catch
you when you face the boss the first time: :) you when dark souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :( you when you ask why do you hear boss music: <( you when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:
. . --------
Why can't Juice Wrld play Black Ops II?
Because he can't handle 6 perks.
Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?
I got the newest Call of Duty game! I got a 200 kill streak, then I went home and played COD.
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because there sad they don't get wanted!!
Bad joke but i tried
My sister is the weired dark one and emo of the family im the bright happy one once in 3rd grade i got a huge A on mine and my sis got a D- In the playground Near a tree we were siting and playing i said "hey a C- is not that bad and raised my hand up to give her a high five but she left me hanging
A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar. These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz "
What Football Club das Mason green wood play for? Prison Fc
Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?
He wanted to be able to finger A minor
Why is a wet pavement like playing music?
If you don't C sharp, you'll B flat.
I was playing Mortal Kombat with my friend when he picked the fighter Pristiano Penaldo. I won and the voice didn't say "Finish him," so I couldn't do a fatality.
I was confused, but I understood that the game didn't let me finish him because he is already finished.
Ryan come out to play-ee-ay!!
