Pet jokes
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
About a dog.
What is a dog that is Christmas?
A Christmas tree dog!
What is so good about a dog that cannot see? Nothing is good.
Why did the dog walk out at night?
To scare his people!
What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
If you are wondering where the dog went, I don't know. Maybe he went barking around.
My bird. PRETTY BIRD! PRETTY BIRD!
Others CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP!
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
Subscribe to Cboystv, or I will eat you like Asians do to pets.
I have a pussy. It's very hairy. It has a long thing sticking out of it. It's also very hair. My hairy pussy meows and purrs.
That moment when you have to ask your Chinese neighbor if he's seen your cat.
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog?
It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
A family had a very disobedient dog. It would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.
I named my dog "5 miles" so when I walk him, I can say I walked 5 miles.
Random guy: I ran over 5 miles.