Peanut

Peanut Jokes

Sandwich

Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."

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  • Smoothie

    My Smoothie Ingredients: - Bananas - Strawberry - The Blood of my ex - Peanut Butter

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  • Elephant

    What did the elephant say to the naked man?

    "It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?"

    Bread

    My mom is the jelly, and my dad is the peanut butter. And I am the bread, the only thing keeping them together.

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  • Woman

    What do women and peanut butter have in common?

    They're both easy to spread.