Parent jokes
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.
How do you make a child’s parents happy?
Put the child to sleep.
Yesterday, I tried to help a little girl by a road stop crying. I asked her where her parents were, and that made her cry harder. So then I asked her where her house was, and she said with tears, "I don't have one." So I got her in my car and drove her to where she said she was living. It was an orphanage.
Lil Johnny looked in his pants and couldn’t find his fish, so he started to yell out, "Lil fishy, lil fishy, lil fishy!" They called child support and sent the parents to jail for putting a fish up a child’s butt.
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.
The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.
I love bullying orphans. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
Little Johnny went to school and right before class started, he pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his teacher told him to put on his pants and go to the office. The principal asked him what he did, so he pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Then the principal called his mom. The mom got there and took little Johnny home.
They got in the car, and his mother asked, "Johnny, what did you do this time?" So Johnny pulled his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Once they got home, his dad was off work and heard that Johnny was coming home early from school. Once again he asked Johnny what he did. Johnny pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his dad was surprised, so his dad pulled down his pants and said, "Big whale, big whale."
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
"Come on, man, give the orphans a break with these jokes."
"No, not until their parents pick them up."
Parents: Let's have a bonfire.
Me: Let's go to the orphanage.
Parents: To bring other children?
Me: No, to have the fire.
Parents: Won't they be missed?
Me: No, because there is nobody to miss them.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because there is nobody to call "daddy."
So when my parents say no to "isms," I say, "Can I be homophobic?"
David’s parents have three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what’s the name of the third son?
Answer: David.
Why can orphans never be kidnapped?
No one can tell them that "your parents said that they would be delayed and I was told to pick you up."
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To try to find his parents, but it was FREAKING USELESS!
I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!