Off jokes

Comedy

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.

And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.

It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.

Rapper

Why was the rapper afraid of ghosts?

Because they kept booing him off stage!

Time

I traveled through time to get my dad back.

I failed because I was 1e21 years off.

Memes

Vegan

I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.

Dora the Explorer

"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.

Hate

Shaenaya hates me, help! And she wants to suck off ******* and ****** and ***** and *****.

Swing

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

Because she had no arms.

Knock, knock!

Who's there?

Not Sally.

Sink

I broke the sink yesterday; the handle just blew right off! My dad was so mad, he blew his stack!

Dog

Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?

To the retail store.

Thot

symple: Why did you include me in this fuckery?

symple: And why the fuck am I the profile picture?

angela: Because you are the thot of the group.

symple: Well it takes one to know one.

symple: Aren't Thot jokes just "whore'able?"

angela: FUCK OFF!

Vagina

Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.