One day, the milkman came to drop off milk.
The boy asked the milkman, "Do you know where my dad is?"
The milkman replies, "I am your dad," then runs off like Batman!
Off Jokes
He entered (kindergarten) class. The teacher said, "Luce, start for us and say the alphabet." He said, "A B C D E F G H I J K *just kidding* L M N O." Laugh my nose off. The teacher said, "Go to the office right now, young man!" I don't understand, he just said jokes to the teacher, lmao :D
"Aww, it's a boy, let me cut off the ombelicul cored, sir, that's his penis!"
"It's a girl."
I saw an orphan and asked them if they had parent permission.
A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog!
Yo, back off from my homey Freshfry; he's mine!
What do girls after sex with Pinocchio?
Wash off the birch sap from the face.
So there was this guy who went swimming one day and got his left side bitten off by a shark.
But don't worry, he is all right now.
"Hipity hopity, get the f*ck off my property!"
Bitch: Nice eyebrows.
Me: Yeah, where's yours, motherfucker?
Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thought it would look cool)
What did the mincrater do when his Xbox turns off?
He raged! 😱
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO!" then ran off. I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
Why did the egg fall off the motorbike?
He was shite.
Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?
Because they took a day off.
Why did Ross fall off the swing?
Because he had no arms.
There was an enemy with a machine gun.
My commander said, "Un-arm the enemy."
So I ran over to the enemy and chopped his arms off.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on one.
8 bit: Are you ok?
7 bit: Yes, I’m just a bit off...
Get it? 8 bits = a byte :)
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Mother.
Mother who?
Fuck off bichon, I'm your mother!
I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!
