Nautical jokes
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel hanging down his pants.
A guy walks by and says, "Pardon me sir, but you've got a wheel hanging down your pants." The pirate responds, "I know. It's driving me nuts!"
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
Three copycats on a boat, one jumps off. How many are left? Zero, because they're copycats!
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship's steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, "Hey! What's with the steering wheel?" The pirate says, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"
A boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick.
The bartender asks him why.
And the pirate says:
"Argh, It's driving me nuts."
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
Why can't pirates play cards? Because they're standing on the deck.
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock.
When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? -- When there's a sail on it.
How much does it cost a pirate to pierce his ears?
A buccaneer.
3.14% of sailors are pirates.
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.