Name jokes
One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out.
"I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂
Angela: Kris, I just met the nicest, sweetest guy ever.
Kristie: Who is he and what is his name?
Angela: His name is Kevin.
Kristie: Kevin? I remember him. He said he had to go to Italy for a meeting, never seen him after that. What the hell is Kevin doing here?
Angela: I don't know.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan.
My name is Mariah Carly Brown, and I am an orphan, and what do I say about your jokes that are not funny... STOP THEM!
Dark humor is mean! All day I go to see all the jokes I find, and I see "Orphan jokes."
What kind of sick person likes that kind of joke? By the way, it is not a question. I have 3 twin sisters! Lariah, Kariah, and Iariah! Iariah starts with an i! So stop the jokes, please!
Why did C.S.C fail the Trig test? Cosecant remember his own name! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
I love your mom and dad's joke! They made it together and called it your name.
Funny things or weird things to say to someone.
Hey... have you kissed a girl before? Weird things to say to someone.
It's hard to find friends that [are] 91% funny, 100% nice, and 1000000% good-looking. Funny!
Weird names to call a girl: Sweetums.
Baby-Bugga-Boo.
Fuzzkins.
Lumpy.
Nilly.
Ninty Minty.
and SEXY WITCH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Gross that's why I am not getting a bf!
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A “Lickalottapuss”.
Kade
The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.
I'm Pastor Moe Mister, Moe Lester.
What is the name of Hitler's WiFi?
The local Aryan network.
Q: Name a murderer?
Aborted fetus: My mum.
Me: (Tim) What's wrong?
Him: Wha...
Me: Are you inTIMidated?
My girlfriend asked me to name all the women I've slept with. I probably should've stopped when I got to her.
I wish my name was Voyager 2...
So I could have the first encounter with Uranus. :)
I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me.
What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?
Names.
"Hi Koko, you said we met a few years ago. What is your real name? Lol."