Music jokes
Q: What is Chris Brown's #1 Hit? A: Rihanna
What did the rapper say to the fridge?
"Give me a BEET!"
I tried to catch yodeling, but he evolved to yodingalig.
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You're my closet confidant!"
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
Listen to the autism song on TikTok.
What did the trumpet say to Trump?
"Hi, fellow trumpet!"
What is the most gangster paper?
Rapping paper.
Today I heard someone playing "Dancing Queen" on the didgeridoo.
It was very Abba-riginal.
Why do women love wind chimes?
They vibrate.
What’s the LGBTQ national anthem?
"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Harold Arlen.
What song does an orphan hate?...
"I'm so lonely."
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
You're so emo, even Billie Eilish can't beat you!
How do you know a rapper is ready to cook?
He drops the beet.
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
What did the rapper say when he lost his voice?
"I guess I'll have to drop a SILENT TRACK!"
What’s the difference between a pornstar covered in slime and The White Stripes?
One has "Icky Thump," and the other does "icky hump."
Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.