Mushroom jokes

If there was a quiz on midgets, here’s the Midget quiz and the questions that would be on it:

1. When midgets get high on any drug, do they get high or medium?

2. Do midgets come out the closet or the cabinet?

3. Are Midgets related to Snow White’s 7 Dwarfs?

4. Is a midget just a human without the mushroom in Mario?

5. Was this funny?

At least he got D.L.A. (Disability Living Allowance), so it's not all bad. Every cloud has a silver lining...even a mushroom cloud.

I am like mushrooms. Nobody likes me, but everybody tolerates me.

Why did the mushroom go to the party??

Because he was a fungi!

What's an old Japanese man's last words?

"Hey, that cloud looks like a mushroom, or is it just me?"

Why does Mario eat mushrooms?

Because he's a very fungi!

Why did the kids love the mushrooms?

Because they're fun-guys!

Why did the mushroom kill himself?

Because he had a mushy life.

My peepee small.

When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."

My dustbin's absolutely full of toadstools!

How do you know it's full?

Because there's not mushroom inside.

Mushroom.

Why were the mushrooms the cool guy at the party? Because he was a fungi.

What's the difference between humans and mushrooms? I don't like eating mushrooms.

There were 20 people in a box. There was not mushroom.

A man and a woman are watching clouds together. The man says, “Hey, that one looks like a giraffe!” The woman agrees and says, “That one looks like an elephant!” The man sits up and says, “That one looks like a mushroom.”

If the broccoli said, "I look like a tree," then what did the mushroom say?

"I look like an umbrella."

A mushroom walks into a bar and tries to hit on a blonde. When she turns him down, he goes to her and says, "C'mon, I'm a fun guy!"