Today I went to the doctor for a test and he said I have 10 months to live. So later that day I stabbed him to death & the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved
Man you hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the months to the end
why is Black History Month the shortest month of the year?
Guy: "can I tell you a joke?" Spiderman: "yes" Guy: "you only have 11 months on your calendar" Spiderman: "why" Guy: holds up knife* "because I murdered May"
Canada being the most educated country in the world is bemusing, considering that Canadians cannot spell legalise and programme correctly.
Oh, and most of them do not realise that it's day-month-year, NOT month-day-year.
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
My wife cheated on me with my brother She didn't have a sister so I improvised and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕 and the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!! comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
9 months later they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
2 years later they went up again then their daughter had a brother.
But 1 little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother..
I get paid more than $200 to $400 per hour for working online. I heard about this job 3 months ago and after joining this I have earned easily $30k from this without having online working skills . Simply give it a shot on the accompanying site...
Here is I started.............>> fixpay1.blogspot.com
I went to an inerview and my future boss said hi my name is watt niseto meet you i Then said WHAT IS UR NAME he then said What is not my name watt is so i replied ugh fine i guess i ll call you wha then he said wha i not my name and then i said ugh fine my name is will knott he then replied hi will not
Luke ask his friend how old is youre father James replied hes as old as me luke then said it doesent make any sense james then said he became father when i was born
Mummy how was i born? Mummy replyed well you father and i got married and soon i became fat and you came out and then in out in out and after u did that a millon times u were born
Im so friking dumb even i need joe mama so fricking bad
Sally had 9 pounds of boobs (9) which was 2 2 many (922) so on the 9th of the month (9229) at 6pm (92296) on 68 street (922968) she went to doctor x to get 6 operations (922968x6) and left her (flip your calculator) boobless
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 37 children and 41 adults during the ages of 31-35 years old. She was then sentenced to a 35 year sentence( Colombian stuff) and came out 70 years old. She then continued to go on a spree and murder 41 more people, in 2 months. 3 years later, 6 stabbed 7 as they were friends. 6 was not sentenced, but deemed a hero. He never forgets that moment. Her soul not floating above, but screaming from the torture it's receiving.
A little girl asks her mum, "Mummy how was I born?" Her mother smiled and replied: Once upon a time, your daddy and I decided to plant a wonderful little seed. Daddy put it in the earth, and I took care of it every single day. The seed slowly grew more and more leaves, and in a few months it turned into a beautiful, healthy plant. So me and Daddy tool the plant, dried it, smoked it and got so hight that we fucked without a condom!
