Mom's jokes
What do my mom and a basketball have in common?
My mom's tits and ass are bouncy, just like a basketball.
My mom gave my friend a blow job for good luck on his job interview, then my mom gave my other friend a blow job for his interview, and they both got the job. Now who needs good luck? Just ask my mom. My mom is a good luck charm.
My mom told me a joke about boxing.
I guess I missed the punch line.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
What do you call a mom that can’t draw? Tracy.
How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad or mom never came home with the milk.
I punched my mom for no freaking reason.
I sold my vacuum the other day.
All I got was dust and my mom's wig.
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the Twin Towers, he will pop up.
Also, my mom's great grandpa killed Hitler.
Me: I will f**k ur mom.
Orphan: I don't have one.
Me: ......
What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?
They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-
Your mom is so fat she was the reason why the Titanic crashed.
Your mom's so fat, Donald Trump built the wall around her.
Your mom #69.
If you're mad, go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their mom?
Why does the orphan eat water with cereal?
Mom forgot to come back with the milk.
I asked an orphan where his mom was. He started crying, so I said it again.
And well, that was my last day at the orphanage.