Mental Health jokes

What did I say to the bridge?

Bye, bridge.

I have OCD and ADD, so everything has to be perfect... but not for very long.

What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.

What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?

They both hang.

What do you call a group of depressed teenagers?

Suicide Squad.

"Self harm jokes aren't that deep."

My friend, while we are shopping and I'm telling her about my mental illness: "You're priceless."

When we get to the checkout: "I'm actually $2.50."

I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.

Will my suicidal thoughts leave me too if I get attached to them?

My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.

I don't call it suicide. I call it population control.

How can you tell what kind of emo you are?

By how deep the cuts are on your forearm.

Even a psychopath is sympathetic when an onion self-harms!

What do you call an emo group?

Suicide squad.

What do you call a group of depressed kids with guns?

The suicide squad.

Somebody: Do you even eat and get sleep?

Me: I have depression, what do you think?!

Hi... I'm depressed.

When you realize you have depression, and depression realizes how stupid you were.

My friend said, "Why do you have depression? There is so much happiness in the world." And I said, "Why do you have asthma? There is so much air in the world."

Suicidal ideation is like wanting to slaughter someone but knowing/feeling that you can't. It's also, in a way, kind of like seeing a really hot chick that you wish you could F, but you again for whatever reason you either feel you can't or you just can't.